I remember one time in college I was sitting by the pool with two girlfriends.
Friend 1 had just learned she was pre-diabetic and was completely freaking out at the idea of having to change the way she ate, for real this time. She had zero trust in her ability to follow through on changes to her diet, even if her health was at stake.
Friend 2 was what I call an “effortless eater” who had never struggled with food at all. Food was not a big deal to her. It was just… food.
Friend 2 took a deep, lazy breath in her lounge chair, sighed, and slowly said, “Well if you want to be healthy, why don’t you just eat less?”
Friend 1 turned beet red, stared at Friend 2 and screamed, “I can’t stick to a diet! IT’S NOT THAT EASY!!!” 😡
Friend 2 then said, “I just don’t get it. Don’t diet. Just eat normal meals and you’ll be fine.” 🤷♀️
I remember trying to keep the peace, but feeling like Friend 2 had been born with some magical gene that Friend 1 and I were completely missing.
Some days she’d eat half a sandwich and then proclaim that she was full and just leave the rest on her plate. Other days she’d eat an entire burger, shake and large fries without feeling an ounce of guilt. If she was handed a piece of cake, she would eat at most, 3 bites.
I wanted to know how she did it. I wanted to know her secrets.
I asked her, “HOW do you not eat the entire piece of cake? Do you not like it?”
She said, “I don’t know. I just really liked the first couple of bites and then the third one just didn’t taste as good so I knew I was done.”
I said, “But sometimes you eat entire burgers. So like what are your rules about portions? What are your RULES about how much you can eat and when?”
She replied, “Huh? I don’t have any rules. I just am really hungry sometimes and then other times I’m not. So like I just eat according to how hungry I am I guess? Doesn’t everyone do that?”
No, sweet Friend 2. No. Everyone does not.
What was even more annoying was that she also seemed to enjoy food more than we did. Like she took real pleasure in eating, and also never obsessed or felt guilty.
All I wanted in the world was to be like she was with food.
Meanwhile, 90% of my brain power was taken up with obsessive food thoughts.
Ooooh it’s time for breakfast! I wonder what I’ll have for lunch. How long until lunch? Should I be good at lunch or bad? How much time will I have to spend in the gym tomorrow if I eat this cookie? Oops there went the whole box. I need to hide the evidence. No big deal I just won’t eat tomorrow. And since I’m not eating tomorrow I can probably have a bit more to eat tonight. How did I eat a whole pizza AGAIN???
I wondered… If I could stop obsessing about food, what would I do with all that freed up brain space? What would I do with all that extra time and energy? What could I achieve?
I made it my mission to become an effortless eater like my friend, no matter what it took. Life felt way too short to spend so much time stressing about food.
And I did it.
I thought she had some secret magical gene that I just was not born with. But it turned out all I needed was a shift in my mindset and a few new totally-learnable skills.
Was it easy? No.
But with a lot of dedication and wise teachers to guide me, I figured it out. And I’ve never looked back.
I eat when I’m hungry and stop when I’m full and it’s just… easy.
I often only want to eat a few bites of a piece of cake because I just don’t want any more.
I take so much more pleasure in food and never feel controlled by it.
I have the desire to emotionally eat about once every few months. So I do. And it’s no big deal.
Food is now completely effortless for me. And it feels even better than I thought it would.
It changed my life so much that I have made it my life’s mission to help other women feel as free as I do now.
If you’re looking for some support, I’ve just opened the doors to my Devour Life Academy. I only take a small number of women so that you get all the one-on-one attention from me that you need for success.
In 90 days, you can go from feeling completely out of control around food, to feeling the desire to overeat and emotionally eat just… disappear.
Feeling a pull to find out more? Hop on a call with me and I’ll tell you all about it.
Even if the academy isn’t a fit for you, you’ll still leave the call with a clear, actionable plan to get you on the path to effortless eating.
Hugs and high-fives to trusting what’s possible,
P.S. Don’t worry – Friend 1 joined me on my effortless eating journey and is healthy as a horse! 👭